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That statement is: "The overwhelming advice is to cheat or leave".

What it comes down to is this: when you reach the point where you can no longer tolerate being in a sexless relationship, then you will...

Even though my marriage was over long before that, including being separated and all but legally divorced from my ex in early 2014.After it was in the open, I learned that there was a whole other world in my family, gatherings, that we weren't invited to... Some of you might now be aware we are out there because we SURELY are not going to act like a creep and TELL you... You have been a great source of knowledge and inspiration. my husband later in the week, that I want a divorce but when he came to bed at 3 am he complained about his kidneys hurting. and especially EP ILIASM -- for being an important part of my life in the year that I’ve been here.A theme in my own formerly sexless marriage and most of the others I see in this board who have not yet changed their situation at home, is a lack of authenticity in their and communications with each other. Before you all scold me for staying in the situation and tell me it's my own fault - STOP. Back in February 2009 when I joined this group, the popular mantra we generally followed was that the ILIASM shithole was "not YOUR fault". All I could think about was if he ends up in the hospital I will never have the guts to tell him I want out. It has been a great blessing both to give and to receive such earnest and loving advice… When I got here I knew that I wanted to get out of my SM, but I didn’t have the gumption to do it.I see and have experienced magical thinking within dysfunctional... This point used to get hammered at newbies time after time. even the “advice” that was a bit cantankerous sometimes. This place was never really about the website, it’s about the people - and the people here supported me, advised me, challenged me, and helped me work...ORIGINAL STORY (2007): Reading all the posts here, I guess I represented the other side.

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